Moed Katan 23 Mourning: Marrying, Observing Shabbat, and Dealing with Dissent

Mourners are to behave differently than other people.  The rabbis suggest that the first four weeks of mourning involve specific ways of interacting with the community. During the first week , s/he does not leave his/her home.  This makes sense, as the mourner is being visited continually at the shiva. During each successive week, the mourner is able to communicate more with other members of the community, slowly joining his/her place in the synagogue and speaking aloud.  

The rabbis wonder when mourners are allowed to remarry. These guidelines are dependent upon whether the mourner is mourning a relative or a spouse.  In the case of a spouse, the rabbis argue when it might be appropriate to remarry. They consider issues including the need for childcare, the experience of loneliness, the availability of a partner with whom one can procreate, respect for the memory of the deceased, and respect for the new wife [sic] who might be subject to comparisons with the deceased wife.  

Men and women are considered separately.  While there are numerous considerations regarding men who consider remarrying, women are encouraged to do so early on in her mourning experience.  This difference is striking.  In most situations we are not learning about how women are to observe the rituals.  Often it is assumed that women are exempt (for women are exempt from mitzvot that are deemed time-bound and positive).  But in this case, the rabbis consider how their halachot affect women.  Why?

Amud (b) focuses on mourning and Shabbat.  Are we allowed to mourn on Shabbat, or does the 
'delight' of Shabbat override our right to mourn?  Which mitzvot must we continue to observe on Shabbat?  Are we asked to observe all or none?  And what difference might it make whether we are observing in private or in public?  Does it matter how the community might understand our experience of mourning?

Today's daf shares an example of one of the most special features of the Talmud: the immortalization of truly dissenting opinions.  In one section of amud (b), we are told that mourners partake in all mitzvot of Shabbat.  It provides a list of examples.  On that list is donning tefillin - which is not permitted.  Tefillin cannot be worn at all on Shabbat.  The Gemara explains how one could have included tefillin on their list.  Was it a mistake?  A general statement of examples rather than a literal list?  Or, perhaps, was this list provided by one of the rabbis who believes that we are permitted to lay tefillin on Shabbat?

Not only do the rabbis include this dissenting opinion, they discuss it.  They do not pretend that all rabbis agree with halacha, even after the establishment of that halacha.  There is a level of confidence and foresight in the act of including dissenting viewpoints.  A lack of fear.  What a pleasure to read!